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Just for Today, Try a Little Non-Judgment

Today, riddled with a shockingly bad headache (and yes, I know exactly what caused it), I wandered off to our local pharmacy in search of a caffeine-riddled elixir to knock it out. You see, although I DO know the root cause of the headache - a difficult, annoying situation that is working itself out for the best, but is causing serious pressure in the head in the meantime - I have found that the one thing that seems to work for me when I get a whopper of a headache is a couple of ibuprofen and an "energy drink."

Yes, it is true - even I - the creator of The Flow Method - have a few things that are patterns that are stuck and, once they kick in, cannot seem to break. Unfortunately, headaches are my kryptonite - it seems like the pain in my head blocks out all attempts to reason with it, meditate it away, or really, to focus at all. They are also my warning flag that something in my life is making me feel stuck, so I definitely respect them when they happen.

For now, I have come to terms with this little idiosyncrasy of my mind, and I am okay with having to reach outside myself to remedy the situation. Someday, I will be so retuned that I won't have to do that anymore, but for now, it's all okay (that is exactly what I tell all my clients, by the way - do not be hard on yourself if you don't see yourself transforming immediately - it is happening and will happen at the pace that it is supposed to).

So, there I am, wandering through the store, squinting against the now all-too-bright lights. Walking quickly (but feeling like I am going through sand), I almost run into an enormous, barrel-chested, hairy beast of a man.

I glance up and manage an, "Oh my, I am so sorry!"

All the while, images of the Harley Davidson bar in Pee Wee's Big Adventure are going through my head - this man looks like he could be the bouncer for the toughest, most frightening biker bar out there.

Suddenly, his grizzled appearance goes into a smile, and he says, "No worries, little lady," in a style so reminiscent of John Wayne that I look a bit harder to see if this isn't a John Wayne sighting in Jacksonville, Florida (for all you conspiracy buffs out there, sorry, no go).

He and I part ways, and as I glance back, I watch him carefully picking out a sundress for a child - perhaps a grand-daughter? I smile at the obvious tenderness of this big, burly, scary-looking man.

I finally grab my elixir-of-choice and head to the check out, where, once again, I am joined by the gentle giant. I glace back and smile at him, and he nods at me - a momentary connection between a blond former-cheerleader and a possible candidate for a ZZ-Top reunion tour.

Then, the most delightful surprise happened: his phone began to ring. Now, I don't normally find this either delightful nor a surprise in most situations, but his ring was, well, positively ethereal. While I would have prejudged him as having - oh, I don't know - "Dirty Deeds" blaring as his ring tone, he had just the opposite - a new-agey "ode to peace" would be perhaps the best way to describe it.

I smiled at him and said, "Wow - that's actually a nice ring tone!"

He nodded. "Yep. I picked it because I thought it was peaceful. Most people just try to annoy each other with jarring tones -I figured I could spread a little joy."

"Well, you succeeded, just to let you know." I smiled again and wandered out, taken with the fact that most people would have judged this man by his burly appearance, thinking him a thug or hell-raiser - when, in fact, he was a gentle soul, wishing to do no harm to others and spread a little joy around his immediate environment.

As I glanced back, he was purchasing a lovely red sundress, and beaming with excitement, telling the cashier, "I got this just because my grandbaby is so special. I thought I would make her day."

So, my challenge to you today is to make today "Non-Judgment Day." Make an effort to speak to someone who you would normally ignore or avoid. Find out a little something about the "odd" guy that sits in the cubicle over from yours. Say "hello" to the hippie or harley guy in line next to you at the coffeehouse.

While you are at it, cut yourself a little slack. Choose to not judge yourself for just a day - or, heck, just five minutes. 

See how much better you feel - and how connected you really are to everyone else in this world.

Have a transformative, beautiful day today.